Mama’s Happy Pills

Pregnant women who are lucky enough to not be sick or sleeping; usually, have a righteous cocktail of hormones coursing through their veins. The very same hormones that help with initial recovery; things like uterus contraction, curbing hemorrhage, pain relief, milk production etc.
After the kid is out and everything calms down, those hormones drop what they’re doing and leave the party; (like when the keg is floated and the chick/dude you’ve been eyeballing is already hookin’ up in the next room) 😐

Continuing with the “party” analogy here: Progesterone and estrogen are the hormones that act like music, candles and cocktails at a party. They set a great mode and get everyone going in the right direction. Take em away, and all you got are a bunch of drunken idiots and a few hot chicks(oxytocin). Sure the hot chicks make the situation better, but it’s still time to leave.

Some women have hard pregnancies…really hard. Constant nausea, aches, pains, tiredness, extreme hormone fluctuations and a hundred other symptoms that can make for a very discomforting 9 months. I feel for these women, fo-reelz…I do.
My wife however, had a RAD pregnancy! (Yes, rad…I’ve never stopped using this word and don’t intend to ever stop). She was happy, healthy and even keeled; I couldn’t have had a better time being a husband to a pregnant woman. Sure she had physical and emotional issues to overcome, but duh? Of course she did…it’s at the top in bold print when you sign up for babies.
I felt that my wife was feeling the positive effects of some strong hormones, and it made me think.
If “I” was feeling a constant influx of great hormones, and those hormones were going to peak(the birth) to euphoric heights…what happens then? There is always a drop off, there’s always a down to the up. I didn’t want anything to get in the way of my wifes happiness with our new child. What could I do, that was cost and time efficient, natural, and easy?

Enter the placenta (key scary music):
Women spend a shit-ton of time and energy in the first trimester growing this muscle/organ. It is the power plant and super computer for growing your baby; and also happens to be the most nutrient rich and good hormone packed substance on the planet. When I heard this, I knew it was time for a little internet research. If you have’t figured it out yet, this article is about women eating their own placenta for supreme mental and physical healing after birth…heh heh..afterbirth. My wife found the idea of dining on her placenta more then nauseating, so making it into pills seemed the most doable route for consumption.

*WARNING-If you are squeamish about this sort of thing, then read no further, and definitely don’t look at the pictures. I personally find it beautiful, intriguing and inspiring.
If this ain’t your thing but still see yourself as a frugal earth loving person, then tell the doctor you wish to take your placenta home with you. You can still plant it in your yard. Find a spot you want to plant a tree, bury the placenta and wait one year. Planting any sooner would probably kill the tree as the nutrient density is just to much for a young tree. After the year is up, plant a tree and watch it thrive and grow along with your child 🙂

Turns out; there are businesses that specialize in this but they charge $250-$350…which is a fair price. But, like so many times before, I figured I could do it myself for a fraction of the cost. After all, I’m comfortable with all the necessary skills required to do the job AND, I have the equipment needed to do it properly. The only thing I didn’t have was the pill encapsulation tool. Found that online for $50 and it came with 1000 empty capsules.

Here is a picture account of my placenta pill making experience. Enjoy.

The Business.

Removal of sinewy membrane. Exposed muscle (placenta)and umbilical cord.

Chopped/sliced up and into the blender. Whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Onto the dehydrator mats. These are not fruit roll-ups kids.

Dehydrated…jerky anyone? Ground into a fine powder.

Pill making mechanism and tamper. Filled tray, ready for capsule tops.

Presto! Troof!

So there it is. I hope some of you find this article helpful and informative.

What About Bob?

The Bob Stroller: How much is too much?
Come with me on my journey as I find a way to justify a $400 stroller.

So, the baby is almost here and we need a stroller. Some friends have a Gracco, some have a standard trike, some have a Bob.

2 options for the Gracco. Either buy one used on craigslist or in a consignment shop, or go to a store, like Babies ‘R Us. This used option is only for you if you’re not too picky about the color design. Definitely the most frugal option.

If you feel that used is not for you, then off to the store with ya. Once at the store you will soon realize, you pay for what you get. If you want something that is lite, easily folds, has good handling, feels safe and looks kinda cool, you are already set to spend $150-$200 for a 4 small plastic wheeled child pusher. The trikes at Babies ‘R Us all pretty much blew…for the price. As soon as we widdled down our choices, we realized we would be spending $200-$250 on a new stroller.

“Well…shit! Lets just go get a Bob then.”

Bobs run $300 without a car seat, car seat adapter, car seat base, cup holders or baby snack tray. I bought a Gracco car seat with 2 bases on Craigslist for $25 or $35. I was assured the carseat was never in a crash, and checked to make sure there were no manufacturer recalls issued. Also bought the “Bob” car seat adapter (which comes with the snack tray) for $50.

So, close to $400 spent and I’ll still have to get the cup holder attachment for the handle bars. At this point I’m starting to think we are nuckin’ futz.

Let the justification process begin:
I purchased this at R.E.I solely based on R.E.I’s awesome return policy, (no fuss, no muss). Another huge factor in the decision to buy the BOB was the resale value! This thing is so solidly built that in 5 years, I’ll still be able to get $200 for it, minimum. Hell, if I saw one in a color other then red, I would’ve bought it used. I didn’t like how bright the red one is.

As soon as you use a Bob, you realize; Ohhhhhhhh, thaaaaaats why you pay $400, I get it now. Wait till you fold and unfold this thing; its so easy, it’s wrong. But that was only the beginning. My wife and I are hikers and have quite an active lifestyle. The fist time I went hiking with the Bob, the money was forgotten…even if I was still paying on it 😉 It handled a serious hiking trail like butta and just blew me away.

Rocks, bridges, steps, un-even ground, uphill, downhill, you name it, it crushed it!

Now the downside. The wonderfully grabby, cushiony, easily removable tires have a small flaw. Rubber tire tubes. Turns out the tubes don’t respond well to thorns.

I was walking on asphalt at some campgrounds in Oregon (Emigrant Lake), and unknowingly picked up a few thorns. 2 in one tire and one in the other.
Until I got a patch kit; those thorns put a serious thorn in our side…gigitty. Now, we had a 25lb hunk of crap that we couldn’t fix or use, and was now taking up space for the remainder of the trip 😦
I realize that picking up thorns is totally user error; but it was really deflating (gigitty), when I’m counting on using it, and a simple little problem puts a kibosh on the whole deal.

A tire is easily fixable but the timing was just bad. So no worries, just remember; stay away from thorny trails and this will be the best damned stroller you ever seen. Oh, and buy a couple $5 tire tubes from REI before you leave the store.